Monday, November 02, 2009

Halloween present from Grandma & Papa Whitmer

Hayden got his very own cell phone as a Treat this Halloween. He pulls out a lot of his tricks in the these videos right after Grandma W. gave it to him. Enjoy.

My Little Lawn Gnome

Hayden Dancing to "Thriller" on Halloween

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Wow, shame on me!

I guess that it has been over a month since my last post/update. Wish I could say I was busy but that isn't really it. Matthew has started classes and so much of his time is spent on the computer. Since our laptop has crapped out on us, that leaves us with one computer. Which is ok, I would rather spend my free time with Mr. Hayden. He is growing and learning by leaps and bounds. He is adding a word a day to his vocabulary. It is fun as he becomes more vocal and is able to express himself in new ways. It also means he is throwing temper tantrums to get what he wants. He knows we can understand him, but I don't think he understands WHY we wont let him play with the electrical plug, or why he cant have two cookies. So we are dealing with that right now.
Like I said Matthew started classes up again. He is still working at the college and seems to be doing well. He was named to the President's List at MCC for maintaining a 4.0 GPA for his summer classes. He was VERY proud of that!
We are looking forward to going on vacation in November to WDW. And planning is underway for that trip. I am ready for some time off work, I am NOT looking forward to leaving the mister Haydens behind. But we all decided that he is just too young this time around. So his 1st trip may be in 2011. Thanks to our final PFD, we should be able to raise the funds in time to go.
Cant believe its September which means its almost time for hockey to start up again. We are pretty excited for that I haven't been to a live game since December or January... I think that is everything. Nothing too new. I'll try to keep up better but work and Hayden monopolize much of my time!

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

August 19th: State Fair, here I come! :)


The Iowa State Fair boasts nearly 200 food stands and more than 40 delectable items available on-a-stick. Here's the list as of August 2008:

Pickle on-a-stick
Pork chop on-a-stick
Corn dog
Cheese on-a-stick
Cajun chicken on-a-stick
Sesame chicken on-a-stick
Carmel apple
German sausage on-a-stick
Teriyaki beef on-a-stick
Corn on the cob on-a-stick
Cotton candy
Veggie dog on-a-stick
Turkey drumstick
Nutty bar
Fried pickle on-a-stick
Hot bologna on-a-stick
Shrimp on-a-stick
Chicken on-a-stick
Monkey Tails (chocolate covered banana on-a-stick)
Taffy on-a-stick
Honey on-a-stick
Ice cream Wonder Bar
Deep fried Snickers bar on-a-stick
Deep fried 3 Musketeers bar on-a-stick
Deep fried Milky Way bar on-a-stick
Deep fried Twinkie on-a-stick
Lamb on-a-stick
Meatballs on-a-stick
Deep fried hoho on-a-stick
Fudge Puppy (waffle drenched in chocolate syrup and topped with whipped cream)
Chili Dog on-a-stick
Funtastick Pork on-a-stick
Dutch letters on-a-stick
Turkey tenders on-a-stick
Deep fried hot dog on-a-stick
Chocolate covered cheesecake on-a-stick
Potato Lollipop (4 thick slices of russet potato deep fried and on-a-stick with dipping sauces)
Pineapple on-a-stick (Fresh pineapple dipped in funnel cake batter and deep fried)
Chicken lips on-a-stick (breaded chicken breast smothered with hot sauce, served with blue cheese dressing).
Cornbrat on-a-stick (bratwurst dipped in corndog batter)
Frozen fudge brownie on-a-stick
Ice cream cookie sandwich on-a-stick
Rock candy on-a-stick
Salad on-a-stick
Hard-boiled egg on-a-stick

Saturday, July 04, 2009

I have almost lived through Hayden and Matthew being gone. The first day was really rough. But I spent last night at Mom and Dad's so that helped. And this morning I slept until 8:30!!! Maybe being by myself isn't so bad after all. It is just so quiet. And I miss Misters' laugh. Coming home from work and he wasn't at the top of the stairs laughing and smiling because I was home... That was hard. But they will be home tomorrow sometime. Mom and I are going shopping in Davenport so that will eat up the day until they get home. Misters' tee shirts are starting to be little small on him. I think he needs an 18 month size. So I am going to go try and find some clothes for him. And thanks to Vicki, I have been craving some soup, salad and breadsticks. I still need to clean the bathroom which is what I am avoiding right now. But the bathtub is pretty gross. I hate giving Hayden a bath in it... so I have to do that. And I need to go get Hayden a couple Camelbak water bottles. He will only use our big water bottles to drink out of. He does well with a straw but he does AWEsome with our water bottles so I am going to go get him a couple that are small enough that he can carry them around. They sell them at Scheels. So I have to go to Coralville, but I hate that its raining. So I will clean the bathroom and hopefully it will lighten up by the time I am done. And while I am there I might as well get some ice cream...LOL.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

I am having fatigue day today. It has been awhile since I have had a bad one. Its a hard thing to explain, but it helps when your boss has a DIL who also has MS, so she gets it when I have an off day. It is, otherwise, a very difficult thing to explain to someone who has no experience with this type of fatigue. Its different from being tired, or worn out even. Its like a total and complete lack of energy to do anything even as small as blinking, so it becomes a conscious effort to do even the smallest thing which takes more effort than you have energy for, its a vicious cycle. And here I am wasting my time typing. I am just hoping to highest hopes that we are not busy today. Or in the very least I am hoping that everyone will do their own work so I don't have to exert too much effort. Here's hoping.

Misters is already improving so much. If you haven't heard, he has his first ear infection, just in his right ear. He has amoxicillin and it seems to be helping him already! He never really exhibited the "classic" ear infection symptoms like fever or ear tugging, he was just kinda whiny and slept a lot and had a running nose which is how he acts when he is teething, so I didn't think too much of it. Till his eye got gunky and then I started to worry. So anyway, he is already VASTLY improving and seems to be in a much better mood. And in my defense, he WAS teething cuz his other top tooth FINALLY came in! we've been waiting FOREVER for it to pop through and it finally did! But he is much happier now. Even the daycare lady noticed yesterday. They wrote on his paper for yesterday that he had a "great day". Matthew had to explain that what they experienced was the REAL Hayden. The one that isn't teething and doesn't have a raging (aka:mild) one ear infection. LOL

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

I have to get this out...

...before I explode. When it comes to customers, I have a high level of professionalism. I will joke when the time calls for it, but when I am on the phone, is not the time for jokes. So yesterday I answered the phone and the person that the customer asked for had stepped out and so that is what I told them. And as I was asking if they would like voicemail, one of the tellers hollered that the person was coming back in the back, so I stopped what I was saying to tell the customer that they had just come back, except they hadn't. The teller thought it was a funny joke, except I wasn't laughing. I was pissed because now I look stupid because I just told them they weren't here, then they were here, and then I had to tell them that they weren't actually here. I was so mad. How could you think that was funny? So I looked up at the teller and I knew my face was red, cuz I was mad. They're Like "Oh look at you all embarrassed." Yes, I WAS embarrassed, not because I fell for your stupid "joke" but because you made me look like a fool to the customer on the phone, but mostly because I was pissed off that they would do that while I was on the phone with a customer! I am still upset about it. The customer was laughing after I smoothed it over and explained the mistake, but I just can't believe that. There is a time to joke and there is a time for business.

Monday, June 08, 2009

I guess it has been awhile since I have posted anything. I don't really have much to post about lately. Just busy working and squeezing in as much time with my boys as I can. I haven't had a weekend with Matthew for almost 2 months now. We always have other things to do. I am trying to make a point of going to Mom and Dad's for lunch on Sundays.

We are taking the Misters to the doctor today, and by "we" I mean Matthew is taking him and I will be sitting anxiously waiting to hear what they have to say. He just hasn't been able to shake this cold and now his eyes keep getting all mattery. I suppose it was only a matter of time though, as much as he rubs his runny nose and then his eyes. So we will see what they say... hopefully it isn't anything... just a cold.

Matthew started English Comp today. This is the class he was dreading, but its better to take it now and get it over with so he can focus on Math come fall.

We got alot of weeding done yesterday, finally. I worked on the front, which was overgrown with clovers. Matthew worked on the back. He cleared out one of the back beds. He pulled out everything and planted his garden. He is very excited. So hopefully, we will have Sweet Corn, Beets (for me), Squash and Sugar Baby watermelon. He worked VERY hard yesterday so I am hoping that everything will come up.

Edit: Hayden has an ear infection in his right ear.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

On Sunday, Misters and I went out to Mom and Dad's to hang out and have lunch. Mom gave Hayden his first haircut. She was reluctant to cut off his curls, but I think he looks much better. He looks like a little boy!

Monday, May 18, 2009

First Day at Daycare.

So today is D-Day. D for Daycare. Matthew dropped him off this morning. I knew I wouldn't be able to do it. He said that Hayden was walking around and laughing and playing when Matthew left him. That is a small comfort when you are trusting near strangers to take care of your baby. Maybe it is more that this is another way I have to let him go, but I don't want to. I know he will be fine. He isn't afraid of strangers. He will [play and eat and laugh and poop, just like he would at home. I am doubting he will sleep there. Not at first anyway. I was standing in the living room after Matthew had left and looking around at all of the Mister's toys, that he should have been there playing with, my heart broke. Just ripped in two. I console myself with the thought that it is only a couple of days a week and for only a few hours. And then he will be with Grandma. But it is little comfort. I don't want to share him. I know that's selfish, but I don't want to share his laughter and his smiles and his talking and his silly Mister walk and his dancing. I don't want to share that with strangers. I don't want him to waste his adorableness on people who will not appreciate it as much as I do. Maybe that is what it boils down to: I don't want to share him.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Well, lets see. I don't really know what I have to talk about. I had a nice Mother's Day. We went out to Mom and Dad's and had lunch and made chocolate ice cream (Yummy!) I was pretty upset that Mom's present didn't come in time, but there isn't much I can do about it. Saturday I FINALLY went to the DMV and got my license changed over. It was kinda sad for me. It was that one little string that was tying me to Alaska was snipped. Granted, I have one more FANTASTIC tie to AK, which would be my Misters. But he is tied, not me, and it was like that license was MY last connection. So it was pretty sad to let that go. But I must move on. Its what I have wanted to do for so long now, and now I have to actually do it. But it is nice to have it done so I can stop thinking about it.

Work is going really well. I enjoy it. And I don't dread coming to work every morning, which is a change for me! If I do have to leave I think I will be really sad. Matthew starts classes next week, so Mister is about to go to Daycare. I still hate the idea of it, but I have no choice and it does seem like an ok place and Cassie says she has heard nothing but good things about it, so that was another mark in the pro column. Really, I haven't heard anything bad either, not that I think about it. I guess we are just starting a new stage in our lives. I am excited that he will be spending more time with my Mom. He just loves her so much. I had several people comment on Sunday about how much he lights up when he sees her (She was up front singing in the choir) As soon as he spotted her he just giggled and smiled... It was really adorable. I was feeling especially emotional, being Mother's Day, holding my son...and then the choir started sining "Go in Love" and I went from smiling to crying in a blink of an eye. I hadn't expected that it would affect me quite that dramatically. I mean it wasn't the first time I have heard it since Grandpa's funeral, but it was hearing for the first time, with Hayden in my arms. Knowing how much Grandpa would have adored my son...I just lost it. So I apologize to Nicole, who lost it, cuz I did...Unfortunately she was up there trying to sing...

Anyway... I guess that all. Most of this was ramblings anyway. OH! if you want to see some videos, Matthew has posted some on his blog, so hop on over there to see those!

Friday, April 24, 2009

Mister's 1st Birthday.

We sang to the Misters right when he woke up. He had the most confused look on his face, so cute. And then after I got off work, we went out to Mom and Dad's. They got him a Little Tikes swing to put on the big swing set, and he LOVES it. They also got one to put up at our house, so Grandpa will have to find some time to come out and put it up somewhere. Wendy and Vicki both got him presents. Wendy got him some bocks and a bubble machine ad Vicki got him the cutest monkey pj's. That was so sweet of them. Our present hasn't gotten here yet, hopefully, it will get here before Sunday but we're running out of days! Today we took him to IC for his 12 month well-baby. He got 3 shots. It should have been 2 but he is WAY behind on the Hib, so we did that today too. He did SO good. He cried right when they stuck him, but then he was fine. He is 26 1/2 inches long and weighs 22 lbs. His head in 19" and in the 90 %. Which is what it always has been, but if his body is going to catch up with his head, we're gonna have a big boy. We took him to Build A Bear and made him a monkey. We named him Mo and Hayden loves him. He held him all through the mall and only dropped him once, which is good for the Misters. Then we went to Bennigans and he had a grilled cheese sandwich and ate almost all of it!

I should have just taken the whole day off. It is a little too warm for me. I was hoping to ease into the 80's a little slower. But it is so nice out, who's gonna come to the bank? Anyway, I have the living room almost dusted and that is all the farther I have gotten so far on the house. I want to get the living room done and maybe the bathroom tonight so we just have the kitchen and the sun room to do tomorrow. But I think Lew and Kelsey are going to be here tonight, but don't know when... Anyway. I will post some pictures of Hayden swinging when I get a chance.

Friday, April 17, 2009

I guess it has been awhile since I have posted. Things are going well. I have really adjusted well to the bank. It is better than I thought it would be. Vicki, Wendy and I get along well. Wendy and I actually worked at Wal-Mart in Muscatine together Well, together isn't an accurate description, at the same time would be better. Small world. I am really focusing on the Misters Monkey Party coming up next week. I cant believe my baby is going to 1. But we need to get the house ready for the "hundreds of people" who are coming. (Matthew thinks I invited too many people) I am pretty sure we will be ready. Mom said she would come over tomorrow and help me clean the sun room, so that eased my mind a bit. I a,m fretting a bit cuz I have to work tomorrow and I have the Girls' Day outing on Sunday so my weekend has, essentially, been cut in half. I am looking forward to a weekend when I don't have to do anything, but I don't have one of those in the foreseeable future, which sucks. Next week, on Friday, Misters has his 12 month well baby check up. I am VERY interested to know what that kid weighs now. He isn't big, but he is SOLID. Like you look at him and you don't expect him to weigh much until you pick him up... Anywhoo. I think that is about all. I don't think there isn't too much "new" stuff to report, just more of the same, really.

Monday, April 06, 2009

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

I am getting so excited about Mister's Monkey Party. He is just so adorable. He makes it so hard to leave in the morning. But I looks forward to coming home to his laugh everyday. The last couple hours that is what gets me through. Yesterday was especially wonderful I was walking up the front steps, and he was laughing and smiling, and he looks right at me and says, "Hi!" Matthew's jaw dropped. My head snapped up and I was like "Did he just say hi?" And Matthew was like "I was just going to ask you that!" So I am writing it down as a first word. Whether it was, or coincidence (which I cant believe it is cuz he has said 'hi' at the appropriate time before) I want it written down. If it wasn't then I'll cross it out, but I am just afraid if I don't then I wont remember on down the road. But it was enough that Matthew and I both took notice at the same exact moment. I know its early, but he looked at me and I could just see that he knew what he was saying. That's hard to dismiss.

I am also very excited about WDW. How can I not be? We are FINALLY going. We have been waiting for this since we got on the bus at Pop Century to go to the airport. But more than that, I get to share it with Mom and Dad. So I know how Matthew felt the first time he took me. And I am happy that Matthew is trying to watch all the movies before we go. He said things mean a little more to him know that he has seen the movies. Like he didn't know the Blue Fairy was from Pinnachio, and she was the fairy of wishes. And he watched Beauty and the Beast for the first time. I love that movie so much, and I have been waiting, impatiently, for them to rerelease it, but I borrowed Amanda's copy, so I loved that I was there for him watching it the first time.

I have to say that this move, leaving Alaska, has worked out a lot better than I thought it would. I didn't think I would be so... satisfied with the results. I like my job. I dont mind going to work in the morning (I don't like leaving my Boys) But being back in Wilton isn't what I thought it would be. I told myself that I would make the best of it, but in the back of my mind I was doubting it a little. But its kinda fun. Its fun to be involved and people know who we are. We're pretty famous around here. Till the novelty wears off, anyway. But the Bank is kind of a central hub in this town so its kinda fun to be in the middle of that, lol. I guess I'm a bit of an elitist, For now anyway. But our good fortune in all of this has not been lost on me. Trust me. I am thankful, everyday, of how the pieces have come together.

Friday, March 27, 2009

I have a few minutes so I thought, since it had been a while since I had blogged, I would do that. The job is going good. There is a lot to learn, but I seem to be catching on. The Proof machine was a challenge, but mostly because I had a hard time reading the numbers people write on their checks. So I would, often times, not balance for that reason. So I would have to go back and find the offending amount. I am doing Panini this week and I apparently rock at it. My first day, Vicki and Wendy were so impressed at how well I did, and in the end I balanced so they were VERY happy. That's what I am waiting for right now. But its going good. I get along with most everyone. Vicki and Wendy are so funny.

Misters is such a big boy. I hate leaving him in the morning but it isn't as bad as it will be when Matthew starts school and I have to leave him with someone else. It is easier now cuz he is with Daddy. I just HATE that someone else will be seeing him grow up. That's why I am glad it will only be a couple days a week. The majority of the time he will be with family, so I guess I can live with that. I don't really have a choice.

I guess that's it for now. Everything is good. OH! No! the most exciting part, we have our Disney trip booked and paid for!!!! AHHHHHHH!!! I am so excited. Now the next 8 months are going to DRAG by. And I FINALLY got the stuff for the Mister's birthday ordered. The monkey party is on. I am planning for Sunday, April 26th. I will be sending out invitations when I get those, but that is the date. I don't have a time yet, but I was thinking 2ish. For cake and ice cream, and I might have some snacky foods. Some dips and chips and monkey bread and stuff like that for people to munch on. I am so excited to host a party at my house. I just need to get the sunroom cleaned out cuz if it is nice out I would like to have the party out there, and on the patio. So we'll see how that plays out.

Monday, March 09, 2009

4th Day

Retha didn't come to work today. (I have been training with her) Her cousin, John Whitmer (no relation), passed away and she has to make all the arrangements. What did that mean for Emily? I was on a window by myself today. I was a little nervous, but I only made a couple mistakes, just things I hadn't been shown, and didn't realize that I was doing it wrong. And at the end of the day, my drawer was only over $5, so not too bad. I don't mind working there. I am the new kid and everyone is pretty nice. I got a weird vibe off only one of the girls, but I think she's warmed up to me. I just felt like she didn't want to have to babysit me. So in the beginning, if I needed help, she wouldn't SHOW me, she'd just DO it FOR me. But I can totally understand that. I can relate to not wanting to have to babysit. I know its easier to do it myself...I've been there. But, like I said, she's warming up to me. I feel like I proved something today, that I don't NEED a babysitter. I'm smart, I catch on fast, and I am not going to be a burden. So she was a bit warmer to me today. I'll wear her down, and if not, I'll be in the "back" room soon and not up front. I want to be clear, she isn't mean or rude to me or anything, just kinda tolerates my being there. Like when she's talking, like telling a story, she wouldn't look at me to include me in the conversation with everyone else, but today she did a bit toward the end on the day. So that's progress, I guess.

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

My First Day

...went pretty smoothly. I am working up front as a teller for a couple weeks, so I get the ins and outs of the bank biz before I move to the "back" room. I have my own desk, with my own phone and extension, and computer. Its a lot of little stuff that you have to keep track of, but I did ok. My drawer balanced so it was a successful day. We'll see how much I retain tomorrow, but all in all it went ok for a first day. I am still concerned that the pay will not be enough, but I am hoping that Matthew gets this intern position cuz I don't think he has started, seriously, looking for employment. And we will be needing a second income. I am covering the insurance and probably groceries, so we have cars, utilities and WTC that will need to come from somewhere. I guess that s where most of my disappointment about not getting the clinic job, stemmed from. Yes, it was a commute and I would be paying more for gas, but the Doc would have paid our premiums every month so that wouldnt be coming out of my check. And that was why I was so bummed, for lack of a better word, because it wasnt all disappointment, it was also worry about the pay difference.

We need to transfer our registrations and I don't know how much that will be, but that needs to be done soon. I also need to get my license changed over, now that I am employed in Iowa I can go get that done. Well, that and I have been putting it off cuz I didn't want to do it, but I cant put it off too much longer. If I go in before it expires, I probably wont have to take the test, but if I wait, I'll will have to and I don't want to take it.

So with all of this going on now, I am feeling more like we live here. It seems more like "home". I say "home" cuz its always home but it hasn't been "home" in almost 7 years. I never thought Iowa City would become "home" when I moved there, but it did. I didn't want Alaska to become "home", but it did without my realizing it. So I know, in time, I will feel back at "home" in Wilton. And then where ever we go from here, the same will happen. Anywhere I can hang my pictures will become home sooner or later. Just give me enough time.

Monday, March 02, 2009


Welp, I didn't get the Eye Clinic job. I am pretty bummed. I was pretty hyped for it. I just built it up in my head, and then I didn't get it, so there has to be a bit of a mourning period. I'll get over it. I guess it is cuz its something that is so different from what I am used to, which is good in the end. It will be a challenge. And I know that there is a reason why I didn't get that job at this time. And it is a comfort knowing that I will be close to Hayden, if he needs me. And I don't have to make that drive everyday. I am a bit concerned about the pay... but hopefully that can be negotiable down the road. Tomorrow is a different day and things will be what they are and what has been set in motion. At least I have a job, and I am grateful for that, I know to be grateful for that. So once again I will be joining the workforce. Boo. LOL.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

The Arrival of the Moving Truck

AHHHHHHH! I am so sick of all of this crap sitting around everywhere. The living room is done. So at least I have that done. But nothing else is finished. Mister's room is almost done except for a shelf and the jerseys need hung, which I asked Matthew you do, but he hasn't gotten to yet. We went to Mom and Dad's today and packed up me and Mister's stuff that was there and hat has all been put away. We have to get another brace for the pole in my closet cuz its bowing. It was kinda before I started hanging anything on it, but now it looks like it could just snap. There are still some boxes left in the little room, and there are a bunch downstairs, but I don't have to try to walk around those, so I am not as concerned about them. I am just ready to be done with this unpacking crap. Its just so much little stuff. I don't remember if I mentioned that we went to Menards yesterday and got the surround for the tub and paint for the bathroom. So We can get started on that soon. I am actually pretty excited about the bathroom. It is going to be so cute. I took a shower downstairs yesterday. It wasn't horrible, but I'm SOOOOO glad I wont have to shower down there all the time. It would be next to impossible for me to shave my legs don in that shower! I am excited to get my bathroom. Mathew is just going to keep that downstairs bathroom as his and the upstairs will be mine.

Lora Knouse called me to set up a second interview. I scheduled it for Friday. Since I am meeting with Dr Jensen on Thursday. I am expecting that to go well, but if it doesn't for whatever reason, I have the bank to fall back on. And if it goes good, then I can just call Lora and let her know that I am excepted another position. And Jim called Matthew and let him know about an IT intern position with a company that is working on the computers at their office in Moline. And the guys, at least the son, is former military so that is a BIG bonus. So he may be going to school and working this internship. He seems pretty excited about that. I wonder if MCC offers credits for an internship? Prolly if you get the internship through them. Maybe he should ask Shelly... Anyway...

Misters seems to be adjusting well. We put him back on his bedtime routine and he is doing fine. Back to normal sleeping. He isn't really taking naps though. But there is a lot going on here. He does take naps, they just aren't very long. Sometime only 10 minutes, but he seems to be fine after only 10 minutes. He is having some issues with his two top teeth. They are right at the surface, you can see them, they look like two little bubbles, but they just wont break through. So in the next couple of days, hopefully, he will have at LEAST one more tooth, if not two. I think he is enjoying his new home. I know he is happy to have the kitties back. He just squeals and smiles whenever he sees them. He has started tugging on tails. Grizzly tolerates it fine, cuz it its too hard. But Jackie doesn't like him trying to touch her and she has started nipping at him and trying to bite him. So we have to keep a VERY close eye on her when Hayden is around, but she usually avoids him. Sleeping on our bed while he is out here and then coming out when he goes to sleep.

We will be sending out a special edition of Picture Thursday this week. Along with Misters pics, we will be sending out pics from Matthew's drive home. And we recovered the pictures that were on the crashed hard drive that were supped to be included in the 1-15 Picture Thursday edition, so those will be in there too. I will also try to gather up the moving pictures from AK and delivery day here in IA. But that is low on my list of things to do right now.

Ok, I think that is enough for now.

Monday, February 23, 2009

I guess I have a few minutes. Our stuff was delivered on Friday. I am exhausted. I want to be done with all these boxes. I sick of having to maneuver around the house. Mom has the kitchen painted. It looks so good. I am VERY happy with the color, it really brightened the room up. We went and got paint for the bathroom and a tub surround to get the shower ready. I don't know when they will come to put it in, but I would say next week at the latest. We still have some boxes downstairs, but I am not as concerned with those because they are out of the way. What I really want is a complete room. I have every room started and none finished. I realize it has only been a couple days but it is getting really annoying to have all this chaos everywhere. If I had one room that was complete, then I could have somewhere to go that was away from the chaos. The living room is close. Not complete, but very close, close enough that it isn't a chore to be in there. I would like to get a footstool to go with the couch. I kinda wish we had kept the ottoman from the hated couch, but whatever. Let's see, what else. I do expect to be done by the end of the week. If I'm not don't by then, I will have lost my mind because this is just making me go crazy. So I WILL be done by the end of the week. Plus, I need to go to Mom and Dad's and pack all of our stuff back up and move it here. i am NOT looking forward to that!

I had an interview at the eye place. It went REALLY good. I am going back on Thursday to meet Dr. Jensen, and if I have his approval, then the job is mine. I am SO excited. Sara, the girl who interviewed me, said she wanted to let me know about Doc before I met him cuz he is very "Iowan" in his humor and it catches some people off guard. She goes "He is probably the most un-PC person you have ever met." To which I laughed and responded, "I don't know, you have never met my father!" I'm not worried, I can hold my own. Also, the bank called me today and wanted to set up a second interview. I need to call tomorrow. I am thinking about making it for Friday, so if Thursday goes well then I can call them and tell them I accepted a different position. I like the idea of working right in Wilton, but I am not really qualified for the job, so it would be a lot of learning. Whereas, I have to drive to Iowa City everyday, but I am so much more qualified for that job, and I'd be good at it. And the other girls who work there (there are 5) are all my age, or close to it. And I wouldn't live in the same small town as the people coming in... I was a little weirded out by that, I guess. And Jensen's offers insurance coverage, no dental, but health. And we get one free eye exam a year, and I get one free pair of glasses a year, and then my contacts and Matthew's glasses would be at cost so that is awesome. But I don't know if they cover Chiro appointments, but I could deal with later.

I am feeling pretty good right now. Better than I have felt in a LONG time. Once I get this job, a weight would be lifted off of me. But overall, I feel pretty good. I am having fun with the house, picking out paint and stuff. I am getting a little more used to the idea of living in Wilton. It was weird at first, but it helps that it comes with built in friends. I mean apart from the fact that I have my family here, a lot of my friends are still in the area and that is nice. I was so tired of being lonely. I mean I love Matthew and he is my best friend, but I like being able to go out and do something and leave them at home... have a break. I have been needing it, and I haven't really gotten it yet. But that is for a different venting post. I guess for right now, I am just tired of making decisions. I understand that when it comes to the house he doesn't want to do something without asking, but when it comes to Hayden, don't ask me everything!!!!!! I think at this point it is habit. "Do you think he's tired?" "Do you think he's hungry" I don't know! If you think he's hungry, feed him. You don't have to ask my permission. Its getting really old. And the worst part is that when I say "I don't know." He gets mad at me. Like I am supposed to know everything. I don't. Make a decision on your own. If you have an idea, try it out either it will work or it wont. But like I said I think at this point its habit. But since he is now too busy doing something VERY important., I have to go get a bottle ready for Hayden.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Daddy's come home...

Finally. After a month of waiting Matthew returned yesterday, safe and sound. It is so good to have him back. Hayden reacted just as I figured he would, he cried. He was kinda scared at first. You could tell he knew the voice, but wasnt sure about what the voice was coming out of. But then he grabbed on to Matthew's nose and then he knew who he was, lol. He was a bit unsure all of last night. He was hesitant to go to Matthew. I know it was hard on Matthew, but he handles it well. Then this morning we were all laying in bed and Hayden was in between us, and he looks at me and then over at Matthew for a while. And then back at me like "Is he really still here?" and looks back at Matthew and reaches out and touches him and looks back at me, and then smiles back at Daddy. Like he had to convince himself that Daddy was back. And now all is well. He is laughing and smiling at him. Last night, Hayden wouldnt smile at him. He would just kinda glare, like he was mad at Matthew for not being with us. And Matthew even said "I think he's mad at me." But he seems to be over it now. Matthew is out of Daddy-mode, so we have to get him back into that mindset. And Hayden has new habits and tendencies that he isnt used to. But they will be spending a lot of time together.

The Eye Care place called today and I have an interview. I am pretty excited. I want this so much. Maybe too much. But I am VERY happy that they called. Ok, Matthew is awake now so I will fill you all in on the rest later.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

I am sick with anticipation for Matthew's return. Everyday goes by and its one day closer but at the same time its still SO far away. I feel like I have been waiting forever for him to be here. And now its only 3 more days, but its still 3 more days. Oh well. We are going to Iowa City tomorrow so I can fill out that application for the eye care place. I still have high hopes for that. I had my bank interview today. It went well. I just think there are more qualified people out there than me. And I am still not sure if I would even want to work there. I mean its REALLY close to home, which is a good thing and a bad thing. You know? I mean everyone there knows mom and dad and Matthew's family...and I would just feel weird I guess. But it went pretty well, I think I answered their questions ok. It was nice not HAVING to talk about LA. Well, I did, but it went well, cuz throughout I was giving examples of "good" work environment and "bad" environment and I eluded to LA almost every time on the bad so Lora asked if I had ever been fired from a job, and I didn't have to say anything but yes, I was but that was the "bad" job I was eluding to, and I just said that I was accused of something I didn't do, because the owner was trying to find any reason to get rid of me before I hit my 2 year mark and I became more expensive. Which is the truth. And it felt good that I didn't have to say anything more, or defend myself against that stupid woman anymore. Well Mom wants to try and get an early start tomorrow so we can go to the house and get some cleaning done and some moving stuff around done, as best we can do with just the two of us and the Misters, who will be an enormous help I am sure. So I should go to bed now.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Ray came this morning to look at the upstairs bathroom. He said it wouldn't take much at all yo put a shower in. A couple hours work is all. A new faucet that has a diverter thingy, and a little more plumbing. So it sounds like it is doable soon. I just need to find a surround I like, or decide if I want to tile a surround... whatever is less expensive I imagine. Mom found some bigger tiles in white, cream and beige that would look nice, and they were on sale. She didn't buy them, of course, but it is an option if we wanted to pursue it. We also painted the inside of the kitchen cabinets today. Just white, and we were very careful not to get any paint on the wood, but we just couldn't get the walls clean, and it REALLY brightens up the inside of the cupboards so you can see. It looks MUCH cleaner, and I'm sorry that you have to mourn the loss of that BEAUTIFUL green color, but I think we will all be better off! I didn't want to get anything on those cupboards so we were insanely meticulous and it took FOREVER. There is a sand paint on the walls, and it just sucked up the white paint. I am going to feel it in my shoulders tomorrow. I am getting a bit nervous for my interview tomorrow. I would maybe feel better if I knew what I was interviewing for. Oh, and the Eye place called, they already got my resume (I just mailed it yesterday, right?) and asked me to come down and fill out an application, so I have to go do that. I might do it right after my interview tomorrow since Mom will have the kid and I will look decent. I don't want to go looking like a hot mess. I better get the table set for when Dad gets home.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Some Updates

I am assuming, because Matthew hasn't called me yet, that there isn't a working phone on board the ship... I wasn't really expecting there to be. He got some good news though, one of the guys from his shop, John Wayne, is on the ship with him. So I was happy to hear that. I am getting so excited for him to get home. We are going to St. Louis on Tuesday to get my car. And Laurie said that the Arsenal called and our stuff is here, waiting for a delivery date. Too bad I don't have a house that's ready for it to go in... but Mom and I are going back tomorrow to do more cleaning and probably some moving furniture. Gotta have somewhere to put the bed and the crib... but we'll do what we can and then when Matthew gets home, we'll be able to do more. But we have a lot to keep me busy until Sunday.

Oh, I have an interview at the bank on Thursday. I have several resumes out, but they have been the first to call. I am not even sure what the job is! Mom was in there on Friday and Bill Vetter told her that they had just posted an opening and that I should turn in my resume. Mom is going to call Annette tomorrow to see if she can get some info on what he job actually is... I am really excited about this job at an eye care place in Iowa City. I want that one too much, so I am sure that means they wont call. It is so cush...and full benefits. So send out good thoughts on my resume situations. I went to Wilton today to drop off my resume at the bank and mail out a couple more, and I got to the bank and dropped it off to Lora Knouse, and I get back in the car to go to the Post Office, and there is only one envelop, and I KNEW I had both when I left the house. And I remembered that I had set them on the car when I put the car seat in, and I must have left one on the car. So I freaked. I pulled a total Coffee Mug, and drove off with it on the car, so I was hoping it fell off in the garage. So I drove all the way back home, and I pulled into the driveway (Keep in mind we had 35 mph winds today) and I pulled into the drive way and there was the manila envelop, caught in the lilac bush at the end of the driveway!! So I snatched it up and drove back to Wilton to the Post Office. So maybe that one will be good luck!

This last Sunday I went over to Sarah's house for game night. It was a little awkward cuz it was Sarah and her husband Mike, Katie and her boyfriend Brian, Cassandra and her husband Mike, and then me and the Misters. I wasn't going to bring him along, but the girls wanted me too, so I did. He was a hit, as he usually is anywhere we go. It was nice to be around friends again. To be invited to go somewhere... I have missed having We played Outburst, which I haven't played in years, and Catch Phrase. And they were playing Pictionary when I left. It was 9 and the Misters needed to go to bed. I'm kinda glad cuz he gave me a reason to leave cuz the teams were uneven with me there and I felt like the odd man out, but they didn't seem to care. I am sure it was a bigger deal to me than to them. I hope Matthew will be willing to go with me cuz we may end up making it a monthly thing and if we do, I don't want to be the 7th wheel every time, and I don't want to have to blow them off every month, especially since I have waited so long to have my friends back.

Monday, February 09, 2009

Friday, February 06, 2009

I realize that I kinda flipped out earlier. I want you to know I am better now. I am still stressed, but I needed to get all of that out. So all is ok. I wont say well, but it is ok. It'll be better in 8 days.


I am so sick of being a single parent. I am tired of dealing with all of this alone. I am starting to get really stressed. i cant get a damn thing done. I am trying to get a resume put together and he wont leave me alone. i am tired of the crying, the whining. I am tired of constantly having to tell him no, and get him out of whatever he is getting into now. I am tired of him waking up at night. I am tired. I am running out of time. I am sick of Matthew being gone. I am tired of being stuck in this house cuz every time I try to leave, he needs to eat or sleep or throws a fit and I cant get him in his car seat on my own. I am tired of crying. Tears of frustration. Tears cuz I miss Matthew. Tears because i am sick of all of this. And I cant do anything about it. I am just going to lose it. Maybe I already have. I need help. I need him here. With me, not on some stupid boat in the middle of the ocean. I am tired of the poopy diapers and all the feedings. I am tired of having to do it all myself. I don't want to be a single parent. If I did I never would have gotten married. I am just at a breaking point. When mom gets home from work, I am going to leave him with her. I need a break. As much as I love my son, I need a break. He is driving me crazy.

Thursday, February 05, 2009

I hate that I have no contact with Matthew. I hate that it is impossible. 12 calls a day was getting annoying, but now I hate that he cant call me. I miss him. I am getting sick with waiting for him to come home. I keep picturing that moment when Hayden sees his Daddy again. I know he's going to do the same thing he does to me when I have been gone, he gets the biggest smile and then starts crying. It breaks your heart every time cuz if you hadn't left, he wouldn't have made that face. But Matthew loves when he makes the doggy lip face. So he should enjoy that... I am probably looking forward to Hayden seeing Matthew more than i am seeing him myself. Don't get me wrong, I can't wait for him to be home, but I know Hayden misses his Daddy. I miss him.

To keep my brain occupied, I am having fun getting decorating ideas for the house. I am taking down the wallpaper in the kitchen (sorry to anyone who may have liked it, but its GOT to go) I am thinking about a blue... maybe a slate blue, more blue than gray. I am also thinking about tiling a back splash under the cabinets (I haven't decided if I'll go all the way around yet) in a blue tile, or multi shades of blue. I MIGHT paint the cabinets too, I haven't decided yet. I am just NOT a white wall kinda girl. I need color. I have been surrounded by white walls for too long. Its just a sign that the house is someone else's... I was also thinking a pale green for the living room. I like the small room's wall paper, so I don't think I am going to change that. I like the stripes. It will take some planning since the layout in the living room area, and the kitchen to the basement for that matter. But I am concentrating on those things right now. I am not going out and buying anything, or making any decisions with out Matthew but I thought it would help me keep my brain busy.

I just feel like I am waiting. All the time. Waiting for Matthew. Waiting for jobs to call. Waiting for this and waiting for that. Waiting to make a decision. Any decision. Waiting to know that it will be ok. Hoping it will be ok.

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Monday, February 02, 2009

Sorry about the lack of videos. I have 10 more to post and isnt working so I will try and get them up as soon as I can.

Helping Mommy at the Computer

Sunday, February 01, 2009

It still feels like I am here on a visit. I know its cuz we are staying at Mom and Dad's but I still feel like we will be packing up and going back any day now. It will be different once we get into the house and it becomes our house, and we unpack our stuff, hang our pictures on the wall... I guess it is a strange feeling...I am afraid that people wont see it as our house. Especially Matthew. I am worried that it will always be their house. But I don't want to feel that way. I don't want to come home and have it not feel like our home. When I come home I want to be comfortable, and I want the same for Matthew. But I think it will help when we get our stuff in there. I hope it will. Because I know that kind of uncomfortableness is picked up on by Hayden. And I need for him to know that is his home, otherwise he will try to sleep in my bed forever and I cant have that! It will be fine. It will all work out and we will be fine. I have faith. I have faith...

I guess I am thrown for a bigger loop because I dont feel bad that we moved from AK. I mean there will be parts I miss, like the mountains, oh how I will miss those mountains. And hockey, of course. But Deep down, that was never really home. Not in the way Iowa is home. We didnt have anything to tie us to AK, besides Hayden being born there, I suppose. But we didnt have any really close friends or anything, not anymore. It was really just the three of us when it came down to it. I suppose that has a lot to do with why I dont really feel a loss at moving. I mean, when I moved from Iowa, I was homesick for months. I wouldnt sleep, I couldnt, and when I did it was because I had cried myself to sleep. But overall, I know that it made Matthew and I closer and stronger as a couple because we had only each other, really. Can you imagine what it would be like if, deep down, it turned out we didnt really "like" the other one? I mean, as a friend, as a person. Does that make sense? I think that is why divorce is so high in the military. (well, one reason) cuz you go to a new place and its justthe two of you, what happens when you discover that you dont really like the other person? People in Matthew's shop were always surprised that we went out and DID stuff together, that we were friends, and enjoyed each others' company. I knew a lot of people who would go out with friends or work extra hours or volunteer to go TDY cuz they wanted to get away from their spouse. Matthew always tried to get out of it cuz he didnt want to leave us. And that makes me happy. I miss my husband.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Overwhelmed, again

Between this hunt for jobs and Misters' new attitude I think I am going to pull all my hair out. I am just feeling over my head here. I dont know what to do for the kid anymore. I know he is missing Matthew. And I know he is having insecurities, but this is getting old, FAST. He doesnt want me to leave the room. He wont take a nap unless I am holding him (which I will NOT do) and he wakes up at night and wants to sleep with me. And I just dont know what to do about it. I am trying to leave him for short amounts of time so he can see that I will come back, but it doesnt seem to be making any difference. Oops... Anyway. I am just hoping that when Matthew gets back, it will help qwell this fear and we can get him back on track.

Monday, January 26, 2009

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Today all of this will be over. We will know how much money Aurora is screwing us for, and we will know how much deeper the debt hole we are in will become. Here we go. Another crap hole of debt. I am so sick of this.

Oh, fabulous. Matthew just called with the fabulous price of our cleaning lady, who from the brief conversation we had, wasn't that good. She had better have been good enough for the price we are paying. Now Matthew thinks he could have done the same thing... But I don't know if he would have enough time. I am trying so hard to be optimistic, but it is so hard when, at every turn, something has gone wrong. I am just so glad the kitties were 1/2 the price we thought they would be so we haven't gone over our planned budget yet. It all falls with this inspection in a few hours, to see what the final price tag will be, but at least it will be over. And then all I have to be sick about is money and how we plan to get it. Or how I plan to get it, would be a better way of phrasing that. I am so tired of being sick to my stomach all the time. Why are we being punished for living in base housing? Why does this have to be so difficult? I know we are fighting a losing battle here. I feel like we are. And each set back makes it harder to believe that we aren't. The only thing that keeps me from giving up and climbing under a rock is knowing that Hayden and Matthew are depending on me, and I dont want to let them down. I can't. But that rock is looking pretty good right now.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009


Yesterday was a LOOOONG day. Hayden did VERY well. I was so proud of him. He was such a good boy. The first 3 hours of the 5 hour flight to MN flew by (no pun intended) the last hour was tough cuz he wanted to be out of his seat, but that is basically the landing so he had to be in his seat. But we got into MN 45 minutes early. So instead of a four hour layover it was almost five. So we ate and talked and climbed on chairs and slept. He did alright. And then we get boarded onto the flight to Moline and it was taking forever and Hayden was getting restless sitting in his seat (I was pretty sure he was just tired) and I was silently cursing them for taking so long. Turns out it was because of our kitties. It was too cold down in cargo for them, so they flew in the cabin with us. They were good too. They didnt make a sound when they were being brought on board. I guess Jackie freaked out a bit at the beginning when Matthew dropped her off, so they put a sign on the kennel to not put your fingers in cuz she would bite. So while they were bringing the kitties on board the flight attendant thought that the sign was a joke, and I was just sitting there thiking "Its no joke. Ask our movers!" But they are safe and sound at Jim and Laurie's and doing very well there for the time being.

Everyone is asleep here, except for me. I will sleep tonight. I want to try to get adjusted to the time change and that wont happen if I take a nap. I am going to go get adjusted this afternoon, and I need to go to the Post Office. Those are my main objectives for today. Oh, and I need to get a few items like wipes and Misters Detergent. My suitcase was selected by TSA for inspection. The suitcase that had the formula in it. Two brand new cans. I figured they would be fine in the suitcase cuz they were new, so even if the top came off they still had the seal and I wouldnt get all over my clothes and shoes (do you see where I am going with this?) So in their inspection, they opened the can of fomula. Because when I opened my suitcase there was formula (expensive formula) all over my suitcase and everything in it. And I know they opened the can because the seal is completely missing. So it didnt explode or get crushed or anything. They opened it. It pisses me off. It was sealed. X-Ray it if you have to, but that stuff isnt cheap! And now I have to wash all of my undergarments, cuz thats what the suitcase was filled with, that and shoes and appliances and toiletries and formula. Randomly picked, my ass. There was a card on top of everything that said TSA preforms "random" luggage searches and my was "selected". Yeah, it just happened to be the one with the formula. If I had know they were going to tear the seal off, I would have put them in Ziploc bags, like I did the open one. I'm so annoyed.

I guess that is all for now. I am too worn out to do a lot of refelctive thinking and blogging about leaving Alaska. Mostly, I dont have the energy to start geting choked up about leaving and missing Matthew. I have the whole rest of the day to get through.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Moving day...sort of

The movers came today. Man they worked fast. The whole house (except for the basement) is paced and ready to go. I was impressed. Our house is full of boxes. Boxes EVERYWHERE! But its done and we are feeling a bit better about this whole process. Misters did a good job. Jackie was a biotch as usual. She started out fine and then I think she got territorial and bite one of the movers. He was super cool about it, but we felt so bad. We wouldn't have let her stay out, but she was acting fine for most of the day. I think she was noticing things were disappearing. Anyway, It went pretty fast. I have some pictures to post. I will be doing a late Picture Thursday. Friday for all of you. Movie Monday wont be happening, sorry, we will be busy that day. Also we had our laptop crash, so a lot of videos are on the desktop now anyway, and that is packed away so it will be a fun surprise for later. Maybe I will try to get the movies up tomorrow while they are packing the truck.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009


Its 1 am. I have decided to take a break. Matthew and I have come up with a deal where I will stay up and clean at night, since I can get more done without a husband and a baby under my feet, and he will get up and take care of Misters when I am sleeping, and then when I get up in the afternoon, I just head to work. So I don't get to see much of my boys, but at least things are getting done. Matthew has a tendency to take advantage of the fact that I am around. So he does all this stuff that he wants to do, mainly work out, at like the WORST times. He quit doing the windows in Hayden's room and left it to go work out, and it was nap time, so the blinds are wide open the stereo isn't turned on and I have a baby who wouldn't go to sleep cuz Mommy had to fix all this stuff and that made him wide awake... anyway... that is over and done with, windows are done, it was just an example.

I have been working on the kitchen. I don't really feel like I have accomplished anything. Which isn't really true, cuz I have been focusing on the appliances, small appliances. The ones that will be packed up in 2 days. I want them to be clean when they get packed, so I have been doing that. And the counters as I go. I have started working on the fridge, and as soon as that is done I will go to bed. I have been up since 7 this morning. I made a pot of coffee when I got home from work. So that is what is fueling me right now, besides the knowledge that I am SERIOUSLY running out of time. I wish I didn't have to go to work. That would make things a lot easier. But that is life, I guess. All these expenses keep popping up. I tell you, NOTHING about this has been easy. We have hit roadblocks at every turn. I am just praying that once we get to the other side of this move things will go a bit smoother. I am not asking that things just fall into place (though that would be nice) but just run a bit smoother. Where we don't have to struggle at everything. Its hard to stay calm. Matthew is just disgusted with Housing and that is making him edgy. He goes off the deep end at very small things. I am quite used to it. Dad used to be that way when I was younger so I know that when it happens you just stay quiet and out of the way till it blows over and then things will be fine again. I am used to it, He did kind of scare Hayden though cuz he slammed the window (which we found out was broken by the people here before us and didn't report it, so now we have to deal with it) I am just tired. Tired of this whole thing.

Well, I should get back to work. I think I am keeping the kitties up. They are trying to sleep and I am invading on their time I guess.

Sunday, January 11, 2009



Bench Videos

Movie Sunday

I am doing "Movie Sunday" because this is going to be a CRAZY week. so this is to tide you over. I cant gurantee what Picture Thursday will be or what DAY it will be since the movers will be here on Thursday and we will be cleaning. I may do it on Wednesday. I am sure everyone understands the situation and I will not recive any flack for falling behind. You do NOT want to be the thing that pushes me over the edge!

Friday, January 09, 2009


AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! I am having difficulty wrapping my mind around the fact that in 9 days Hayden and I will be on a plane home. I have been preparing for this for what feels like FOREVER and it is finally here. And I am not sure what to do. LOL. Isn't that ironic? I have been trying to "do" for so long that now that I need to DO something I just don't know what to do.

#1 on my list is taking care of Misters. He has had the runs for 3 days now. He doesn't have a fever and he isn't cranky or anything, He just has really watery poo. Poor baby, has a hellacious rash too. I am trying to stay on top of the diapers, but its so watery that I cant keep him from getting the rash. Poor Misters. It looked better this morning. And he didn't wake up with Poo all over him so that is an improvement from the past couple days. I think he may be just a bit dehydrated so I have been pushing the formula and a bit of water. He loves drinking from a cup so I give him a bit of water. He did have tears when he was crying yesterday so I am not too concerned quite yet. He did have some pellets this morning, so that is promising. Unfortunately, the sink that the washer drains intois clogged and the repair people wont be here till this afternoon, so I have two hampers of my dirty clothes and a hamper full of poopy sheets and outfits that I cant wash. Is it funny that I have written a longer paragraph about Hayden's poop than I did on moving? Or is it funnier that you read it all?

Oh, and I should also mention that Matthew has started using his blog, for real this time. And he would appreciate your readership. He loves comments, and new followers. You can click on my link to the right under "My Favorite People" click on the hyperlink. Oh, and PLEASE vote in his poll... Please.

Monday, January 05, 2009

Last Ones

It took me awhile to get these posted.


Movie Monday

Sunday, January 04, 2009

We have made the decision to fly the kitties home. I have done A LOT of research and we have decided that we will go with Northwest's VIP Cargo service. It is same day service so it is the least amount of flight time, and the best care cuz its made for shipping animals. And Northwest does a ot to care for your pet and make sure that they are comfortable and safe during theor flight. So we are going to go that route.

Thursday, January 01, 2009

Oh my goodness, this cat thing is turning into the biggest, most expensive pain in the ass. I am SOOOO ready to say Eff it leave them here. But that would set him off again. I know we have the money, its out Disney World money, but we have it. It means less time in Disney World, which sucks really bad, but what other choice do we have? Oh, I know, not send them home. Nothing about this Eff-ing move can be easy, can it? I dont even care anymore. Send them, dont send them, I dont give a shit anymore. We have larger issues in that this is taking all of our money so I have A LOT of cleaning to get done in the next 18 days and I have money to make and child to watch. I cant worry about these stupid cats that I didnt even really want in the first place. I like the kitties, I would miss them if they were gone, but I'd get over it. I am just done. I dont care anymore. I have so many other things to be concerned about that I dont need to bother myself with this issue. I have a whole house to clean. And I am out of cleaning supplies, so I have to go buy all new ones and then probably have to send them home with Matthew since they dont ship chemicals... I just want this shit to be over.
I just keep thinking about hosting Hayden's first birthday party. Having people over, family over, to the house. Having cake and ice cream.... When I start freaking, I just think about that. Its a special thing that I cant wait to do...

Our Windows

Those are not water pools, thats ice.

LOL> nothing makes you feel old like sleeping through New Years. Oh, well. We had a hockey game, at which both Matthew and I were falling asleep because it was past our 9 o'clock bedtime. Came home, put the kid to bed...we were in bed by 10:30, asleep by 11. Happy New Year. Oh, well, we have a lot of stuff going on, I don't need to be losing out on more sleep than I already am just because there is a 9 instead of an 8. In 365 days, it'll happen again (God willing)

We haven't solved the cat issue yet. Matthew is thinking that we can fly Jackie home and he can drive with Grizzly, cuz she's more laid back, and sleeps in the car. Jackie freaks out. He is just worried about that 3-4 day lay over in Juneau. There aren't any hotels there that allow pets. I told him to just sneak her in...Word to the wise, don't make that suggestion, cuz he flips out. Yelling about how its easy for me to say that cuz I don't have to do it. I resisted from snapping back that there is nothing easy about this whole situation for me. And it was pretty insensitive thing to say to me, but I resisted...With GREAT effort. 18 1/2 days. I am trying to get this place cleaned cuz I wont be here when he has final out inspections from the house. Since TMO is coming on a Friday and then I have the weekend to clean up what I couldn't do, maybe Diana will loan me her vacuum, and then 9:15 Monday morning Hayden and I are out of here, and Matthew is on his own. Hopefully only till the 22nd, but I am not counting on that. I am expecting him to have to take the Feb 4 ferry, and not the Jan 22. It sucks cuz he wont be home till Feb 15...but it is what it is. We'll survive. But Misters is going to miss him SOOOOOO much. You should see his face light up when Matthew gets home from work. It would melt your heart. There is a month between when we leave and when we will see him again. I know that Matthew and I have been apart for longer than that, but that was before Hayden. I just hate to think about what he will miss in that month. I just hope that he starts walking before or after that month. Oh, the things I find to fret about.