AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I am so sick of being a single parent. I am tired of dealing with all of this alone. I am starting to get really stressed. i cant get a damn thing done. I am trying to get a resume put together and he wont leave me alone. i am tired of the crying, the whining. I am tired of constantly having to tell him no, and get him out of whatever he is getting into now. I am tired of him waking up at night. I am tired. I am running out of time. I am sick of Matthew being gone. I am tired of being stuck in this house cuz every time I try to leave, he needs to eat or sleep or throws a fit and I cant get him in his car seat on my own. I am tired of crying. Tears of frustration. Tears cuz I miss Matthew. Tears because i am sick of all of this. And I cant do anything about it. I am just going to lose it. Maybe I already have. I need help. I need him here. With me, not on some stupid boat in the middle of the ocean. I am tired of the poopy diapers and all the feedings. I am tired of having to do it all myself. I don't want to be a single parent. If I did I never would have gotten married. I am just at a breaking point. When mom gets home from work, I am going to leave him with her. I need a break. As much as I love my son, I need a break. He is driving me crazy.