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Friday, December 19, 2008

Ahhhhhh.

I cannot tell you how lighter I feel right now. I cant describe it only because I cant adequately describe how much pressure I was under and how stressed I was feeling. I mean I know I am an emotional person, but I cry easily. That is different from being emotional. The stress induced breakdowns, that was different. I was caught off guard by the severity of the stress I was under until I broke. Oh, crap, hold on, my son is dismantling his car seat. Ok, I just hope that this all pans out...especially since I have foregone the Rockford thing entirely so I am concentrating on this plan, so the sooner I know if its a go, the sooner I can release this fear entirely. I was so sure we were going to fail. I wanted so badly to believe tat everything would work out, but I never really believed it. I know that's why I was so stressed. Because I didn't know how to keep us from failing, but now we have a transition plan instead of jumping in a just hoping that it all would work out. That just isn't being realistic.

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