Lilypie Third Birthday tickers

Monday, June 16, 2008

Hayden is handling all this excitement like a champ. And he is talking so much. He has been increasing his interaction time and seems so much more focused and responsive. And really interacting. And he has been smiling A LOT. I wish Matthew were here to see him. I know that he will when he gets back, but I hate that he is missing it for the first time, you know? I know he has seen him smile, and he can hear him talking on the phone, but its not the same. He misses Hayden so much. And what sucks is that in a couple weeks he is going to have to leave again. Meanwhile I am trying to deal with my fear of leaving him to go to work. I just don't want to leave him with someone else. And I am REALLY trying to be ok with the idea, but I'm not. How do I know he's ok How do I know if he's eating or sleeping ok? What if he gets scared at someone else's house? And I am not there to comfort him. He's my little baby. I don't know if I can do this... I am going to cry so hard that first day, even if its just for a couple hours at first, I am going to cry!!!!

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