WHAT was I thinking?

Ok, in my desperate need to be "normal" I have decided that I need to do the things that everyone else is doing. So out of this desperation, I got some rollerblades. I miss skating, but I think I should have gotten skates and not blades. But Marcus, Amelia and Matthew all got blades cuz they were having a really good sale, so I got some too. And they are AWESOME! SO I put them on today, and I realized that i made a HUGE mistake. I do not have the balance to pull these off anymore. When I was young, yes, I loved my rollerblades, but never had anywhere to skate. Now I have a place to skate and not the ability. Since that time I have developed a very large lesion on my cerebelum which, if you'll journey back to high scholl biology, controls your balance. It is the reason why I would fail a field sobriety test. (not that I drink and drive anymore, not since my stupid college days)

Maybe I will go back and exchange these for skates :(, at least I'd be able to participate with everyone else, but I dont have the balance...

But I LOVE these rollerblades, I dont want to exchange them. Its one more thing I am going to have to give up while everyone else does whatever the hell they want to do. They get to rollerblade and have fun, and I have to hang back cuz my body is eating its self awhile one brain lesion at a time, and I dont seem to be dealing with this all that well. I'm depressed that I cant do what I want to do. I am jealous that Matthew, and Marcus and Amelia have yet one more thing to do without me. And that makes me so mad. Mad at them cuz they arent sick. Mad at me cuz I am. Mad at the world. Mad at my disease. And most of all, mad at me cuz I am letting this get to me as much as I am.