I'm gonna pull an Amanda and talk about my dream here. I usually can remember my dreams, if they were pleasant ones. If they were scary then all I can really remember is the feeling of terror I have when I wake up. Last night I was so scared, I hed to call Matthew up to sit with me til I fell back asleep.

I was at mom and dad's house and we were having a Christmas party. It was kinda chilly out but no snow. I was sneakiing around, crawling in the garden, cuz I dont thik I ws supposed to be there. And there was a kid with me, I think she was mine. And there was this machine that was like a bubble machine only it was snow flakes. When they came out of the machine they were really small but thet would grow and they would get so big that they would turn into clouds in the shape of snowflakes. (this part I am sure came from doing my Christmas cards last night, you will understand when you see them) I was laying on top of my little trailer/camper that I was staying in apparently watching the snowflake clouds and All of a sudden everyone was running because there was a tornado. I jumped off the roof was helping people to safety inside the house and I felt the need to shut off all the lights. And I remember thnking "The lights dont matter in a tornado, get downstairs" SO it is me and my child and Lew. left. And I could see the thing coming and I knew we didnt have time to get to safety. And I was holding on really tight to a pole, hand rail thing a la Twister, and we were get hit. And I had to choose which to save, my child or my brother. I couldnt hang on to both. And I woke up trembling, I dont know who I chose. I dont really want to know. But it scared me.

So here i am again, unconcerned with the count down. I am fighting myself from falling asleep which is what I really want to do. I had to open the store at 9 this morning and I have to again tomorrow. And I know I will be exausted, but I keep tellingmyself it will be ok cuz I can sleep on the plane. But the flight from Anchorage to Seattle, I can never fall asleep. I know I have made that trip about 15 times. BUT I have started my laundry and I have started packing so I am making some progress.I figure I can just do my hair and makeup at work tomorrow so I can get that packed up. And most of my clothes are clean so it ok. Better get back to work.