I feel like I need to be shot or something. I forgot that this was the last Sunday before Christmas, which means we had Family Christmas... I need to come home soon. That is really all there is to it. I told Lori yesterday that I was planning on going home in March. I just didnt tell for how long. Matthew wants to come home for three weeks but i dont know if I can do that. I hope she lets me. And I told her that I wanted to come home next year for Christmas. She said as long as there is someone to cover my shifts then I can leave. That wont be too hard. Its easier to for me to have my shifts covered than it is for Rohni. No one can open except me and i have to close so we are kinda in a bind. But anyway...

We havent gotten a call about a house yet. I just dont even want to think about having to move again. And I dont have a ready supply of boxes like I did when I worked at WM. So that will be a challenge. I would really like it to be after the holidays. Matt wants it to be next week since he has the whole week off and could get a lot of moving done. I havent decided how we are going to do this. If we are going to start with the bedroom and sleep over there at the house and eat and stuff here or do the kitchen and the bedroom and have the TV and stuff over here. I dont know. It will be interesting. Always a challenge.

I have been getting pretty emotional lately. It will probably be worse by Saturday. I just dont feel like it is Christmas, but I want so badly to not be sad. If I am sad, Matthew will be sad, and I dont want that. I want him to have a happy Christmas. I mean I know I will have a happy Christmas and that not everything can stay the same and I know that we are starting our own traditions and all of that, but i need to be a bit irrational about it too. You know? I cant always look and the logical side of things. Sorry it is just not who I am. But I need to go to bed, my husband is waiting for me. I wil write later when I have more time.